Weird and Weirder

Weird: Cheering against the Cleveland Indians.
Weirder: Cheering against the Cleveland Indians when they are hosting the Tampa Bay Devil Rays, a team that I am on the record as hating more than the New York Yankees.

The pennant race does funny things to baseball fans.

"Putting the Speed Out There"

ESPN's color man just said that exact phrase when the Yankees put a pinch runner in for Jason Giambi. The pinch runner? Mark Bellhorn. I don't think you have to be a Red Sox fan to know how funny that is.

Three for Three

That's as in 'Three Picks for Week Three.' Why so few? Because, honestly, how many games do you feel comfortable picking this week? Half the "experts" out there are under .500, and those who are over that don't exactly have much breathing room. Still though, three? Even Ron Jaworski picks 5 games, right? Sure, which is why I'll be picking one more game each week than I did the week before, while Ronnie will be stuck on 5. Why? Because anyone with 2 brain cells to rub together can cherry-pick 5 games in week 13 and pad their record. Not I. The only 2 other rules that I'm setting forth is that (1) I have to pick the New England and Cleveland games every week, but considering the title and subheading of this blog, that should really go without saying, and (2) I'm picking the winner, I'm not picking against the spread. Why no spread? Because I went to Boston University, not sports gambling capital of the northeast Boston College, that's why.

New England Patriots @ Pittsburgh Steelers

The sky is falling! The sky is falling! The Patriots have been exposed! No Weis, no Crennel, no Bruschi, no Johnson, no Law (actually, people haven't said Law as much as I would have thought, but they always seem to include Johnson, which if you consider how often he was sidelined with injuries, is a little mystifying)! Injuries to multiple defensive backs! Corey Dillon averaging less than 3 yards a carry! Doom! Gloom!

Ben Roethlisberger is the highest rated QB in the league! Blah! Blah! Blah!

"Big" Ben threw 10 tosses last week. 10. I'm surprised he even has enough passes to qualify to be the league leader in this category. To me, this would be equivalent to Mike Myers coming out of the bullpen in the Red Sox's second game of the season, retiring one lefty, and then slipping his jacket back on and taking a seat in the dugout while the media exclaimed "He's the league leader in ERA!" In truth, Ben hasn't done anything yet this year, he hasn't been tested, and his numbers are meaningless.

Ben is Peyton-Lite. All the Pats need is one big play, and the doubt will creep in, and Ben will self-destruct.

Bold prediction: Pat's score one defensive, one offensive, and one special teams TD.
Bolder prediction: Troy Brown scores one defensive, one offensive, and one special teams TD.

Final: Pats 24, Steelers 17

Cleveland Browns @ Indianapolis Colts

As much as it pains me to say, I think Romeo Crennel and Joe Andruzzi are in for a new experience today, getting blown off the field by the Indianapolis Colts. The reason? No one excels during meaningless early games against non-contenders the way that Peyton Manning does.

Final: Colts 42, Browns 13

Cincinnati Bengals @ Chicago Bears

Chad Johnson apparently has a list of the DBs he'll face this season under a sign that says "Can they cover Chad Johnson?" (or something to that effect). He wrote 'No' next to his first two opponents. If Jerry Azumah is healthy enough to play today, Johnson should be prepared to write his first 'Yes.'

Final: Bears 24, Bengals 10

Physical Pain

When I watched the conclusion of the ChiSox-Tribe game on FSN Ohio last night, and the Wild Card standings update flashed on the screen, it represented the absolutely low point of my time as a Red Sox fan in Cleveland (ignoring, of course, how I felt after Game 3 of last years ALCS, which is easy because, in retrospect, I know what transpired over the following 8 games). The realization that my team had to chase the team that most of the people I see on a daily basis cheer for, the people who see me wearing a Red Sox hat every single day, caused me a moment of actual, physical pain.

Or maybe it was because I punched my futon.

Probably both.

AHL on PS2

Well, this is exciting for an AHL fan to see. Apparently, Gretzky NHL '06 has acquired the official AHL license, so all 27 teams will be playable on a home console for the first time, well, ever. They seem pretty excited about it too, since AHL teams get a considerable amount of time in their trailers, although they focus on the "big market" teams like Houston, San Antonio, Cleveland and Toronto, but rest assured New Englanders, the Monarchs, Monsters, Pirates, Baby-Bs, Falcons, Tigers, and Pack are on there too. At first I was a little bit worried that the AHL teams would be sort of half-assed, with teams assigned "Generic Arena 11" like mid-majors in NCAA basketball and football games (I'm glaring directly at you EA and Take Two), but the word around the net is, they have their real arenas too. This is great news not only as an AHL fan, but also as a college hockey fan, since you can play games in important college hockey venues like the Verizon Wireless Arena, Tsongas Arena, Dunkin' Donuts Center, Van Andel Arena, and the Aud, not to mention Joe Louis Arena, XCel Energy Center and the FKA FleetCenter, included for more obvious reasons. It also marks the return of the Hartford Civic Center to a game with an NHL license, meaning plenty of people will be using the Hurricanes' throw back jerseys and moving the team back to Connecticut (if game settings allow). Anyways, it's a great time to be a New England sports fan, and a video game fan.

Check out the game's official site here:
http://www.us.playstation.com/Content/OGS/SCUS-97466/Site/

A Future Trivia Question

Question: What was the result of Boston College's first play from scrimmage in their inaugural ACC football contest?

Answer: An interception, returned for a touchdown by Florida State.

Congratulations Boston College on being eliminated from legitimate national championship contention after your first conference matchup of the season. Sure, you might make the [Insert Sponsor Here] Bowl, but really, if that's what you're playing for, why bother?

Missing the Rem Dawg

Those of you lucky enough to live in New England right now, as our Red Sox inch ever closer to dethroning the Yankees for the AL East crown for the first time in Lord-knows-how-many years (I want to say 7), know not my pain. I live in a dark world where the Sox are available on TV once every other week or so (unless they're playing the Yankees), and am subjected to intolerable egomaniacs or clueless buffoons or both (I'm looking at you , Joe Morgan) for color men. Oh, how I miss the incomparable Jerry Remy. I even miss his and Don Orsillo's gigglefests that swallow up the middle innings of most telecasts. Just remember how lucky you are, New Englanders.

In other news - The Sox lead the Earth Angels of Anaheim 6-3 in the top of the sixth. Good times.