Missed Opportunities

It's a shame that sporadic posting has really kept me from making this blog all it could have been from the viewpoint of a New England sports fan from Cleveland. Missed opportunities for commenting on major events include:

- Willie McGinest signing with the Browns.
- The trade which resulted in the swapping of Coco Crisp and Josh Bard for Kelly Shoppach and others.
- The Cleveland Barons of the AHL moving to Worcester and becoming the Sharks (especially considering the euology I gave hockey in Worcester).

Oops. Hopefully, I won't miss such easy opportunities to provide my lousy brand of insight in the future. My bad.

Three for Three

That's as in 'Three Picks for Week Three.' Why so few? Because, honestly, how many games do you feel comfortable picking this week? Half the "experts" out there are under .500, and those who are over that don't exactly have much breathing room. Still though, three? Even Ron Jaworski picks 5 games, right? Sure, which is why I'll be picking one more game each week than I did the week before, while Ronnie will be stuck on 5. Why? Because anyone with 2 brain cells to rub together can cherry-pick 5 games in week 13 and pad their record. Not I. The only 2 other rules that I'm setting forth is that (1) I have to pick the New England and Cleveland games every week, but considering the title and subheading of this blog, that should really go without saying, and (2) I'm picking the winner, I'm not picking against the spread. Why no spread? Because I went to Boston University, not sports gambling capital of the northeast Boston College, that's why.

New England Patriots @ Pittsburgh Steelers

The sky is falling! The sky is falling! The Patriots have been exposed! No Weis, no Crennel, no Bruschi, no Johnson, no Law (actually, people haven't said Law as much as I would have thought, but they always seem to include Johnson, which if you consider how often he was sidelined with injuries, is a little mystifying)! Injuries to multiple defensive backs! Corey Dillon averaging less than 3 yards a carry! Doom! Gloom!

Ben Roethlisberger is the highest rated QB in the league! Blah! Blah! Blah!

"Big" Ben threw 10 tosses last week. 10. I'm surprised he even has enough passes to qualify to be the league leader in this category. To me, this would be equivalent to Mike Myers coming out of the bullpen in the Red Sox's second game of the season, retiring one lefty, and then slipping his jacket back on and taking a seat in the dugout while the media exclaimed "He's the league leader in ERA!" In truth, Ben hasn't done anything yet this year, he hasn't been tested, and his numbers are meaningless.

Ben is Peyton-Lite. All the Pats need is one big play, and the doubt will creep in, and Ben will self-destruct.

Bold prediction: Pat's score one defensive, one offensive, and one special teams TD.
Bolder prediction: Troy Brown scores one defensive, one offensive, and one special teams TD.

Final: Pats 24, Steelers 17

Cleveland Browns @ Indianapolis Colts

As much as it pains me to say, I think Romeo Crennel and Joe Andruzzi are in for a new experience today, getting blown off the field by the Indianapolis Colts. The reason? No one excels during meaningless early games against non-contenders the way that Peyton Manning does.

Final: Colts 42, Browns 13

Cincinnati Bengals @ Chicago Bears

Chad Johnson apparently has a list of the DBs he'll face this season under a sign that says "Can they cover Chad Johnson?" (or something to that effect). He wrote 'No' next to his first two opponents. If Jerry Azumah is healthy enough to play today, Johnson should be prepared to write his first 'Yes.'

Final: Bears 24, Bengals 10

The Pride of Chestnut Hill

There's something magical about being in Cleveland when William Green (Boston College, Class of 2002) decides to throw a haymaker at the Pittsburgh Steelers' Joey Porter, nearly an hour before gametime, and completely misses. Every channel on the dial keeps showing clips again, and again, and again. I can't decide which shot is my favorite, the one where Green misses, or the one where a bloody Green is walking away from the field, because Porter certainly didn't miss. I hope Green was able to clean himself up in time to watch the kickoff from the locker room, because it would be a shame to think he missed a single second of his team losing without him. Of course, he's watched the Browns play without him before, since he, along with fellow Chestnut Hill College alumni Bill Romanowski and Mike Cloud, has had the honor of serving a four game suspension for violating the league's substance abuse policy in the past. Maybe it's something they pick up on the streets of Newton. In any case, Green certainly didn't learn how to fight in college, because Bill Romanowski has certainly never swung his fist at someone and missed. Sadly, Bill is prone to put up his dukes against teammates in the locker room, with career-ending force.

In other news, the Patriots finished dismantling the Bills 29-6 on Sunday Night Football mere moments ago. Poor Drew.